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Lifestyle

Tired of Sex? Tell Me About It!

Illustration: greatreporter

In a world drenched with the desires of the sex-starved and satiated, one reporter decides she's had her fill…

Firstly, let me pose a question. “Is everyone in the world obsessed with sex?” Let me follow it with an answer (saves you doing it): “In a nutshell, yes”.
It struck me as soon as I was around 15, when my secondary school girlfriends used to spend whole lessons discussing what they either were going to do or had already done with their boyfriends. Their fantasies. Their fears. Their experiences…

Luckily we all still managed to pass our exams, so no real harm done.

Then came college, two years of pure sex-talk.

If you’re having it, you talk about it. If you’re not having it, you moan about it.

It strikes me that the world must be full of sex maniacs. This unnerves me slightly.

Is there honestly nothing better to discuss in the world than David Beckham's affair, whether her down the local has slept with as many guys as you’ve heard she has and what your favourite sex position is?

People everywhere, everyday are being bombarded by sex, and the media is probably the main culprit.

Young, ‘independent’ role models sing about “the touch of their own hand”, movies are becoming more and more explicit, and newspapers always seem to carry a cover story explaining in explicit detail about how some blonde tramp had a “rampant love-making session” with a 'celebrity'.

When even my dog seems more interested in the opposing species than in chasing her tail, something is not right with the world.

Don’t get me wrong. I sound like I’m 500 years old, and hate anything sex-related. This is not true, I’m 18 you see, and I don’t mind the odd chat about sex, so long as it is not all day everyday!

Come on, I honestly do not care how many orgasms you had last night, or what size your boyfriend’s balls are.

It could just be that I’m more mature than most of my friends, but, is it just me or are there actually more interesting things going on in people’s lives? Why don’t we ever discuss real issues that affect us?

Yes, ok, I’m sure sexual pleasure affects you all very strongly, but still, why not talk about your future, or is it that you just don’t believe you have one beyond the next night of passion?

At this age we are more than just sexual animals, like it or not, we are adults with responsibilities. And taking responsibilities up is what we have to do.

It was very funny to giggle and blush when I was a young naïve 14-year-old whenever anybody said the word ‘penis’ but haven’t we outgrown this yet? Judging by my own social group, no. Whether anybody else agrees with me I don’t know, and quite frankly I don’t care.

So have sex with your partner, rolling in a field of manure for all I care, but I’m not listening to, reading about or watching the ensuing tales anymore.


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